Will Psychology Help Heal My Broken Heart?
Psychology may help us understand why men and women react differently when trying to overcome conflicts in a relationship and mending our broken hearts. From time to time there are going to be arguments if you are dating or in a marriage. It can make matters worse if the couple’s way of dealing with conflict cause them to make things worse. Whether you are married or just dating, couples have turned to marriage counselors or other forms of relationship guidance. You will realize through counseling some things that will help you to understand how each other thinks.
There was a study funded by the National Institute of Mental Health which showed that most couples who had been together for only a couple of months between the ages of 18 and 21 avoided intimacy and being dependent on their other half. Concerns of being rejected or abandoned increased levels of anxiety was also uncovered in the study. Those tested all exhibited different degrees of the anxiety over being abandoned. When dealing with anxiety and thoughts of abandonment, people reacted to it differently and those who were more secure in themselves had lower levels.
What was interesting in the testing was how differently the results were in both men and women. When using these subjects, the ones researching relationship psychology found that in their physiological reaction to relationship conflict, the reaction in men was more easily noticeable. The majority of men were found to have an increased reaction to anxiety while only those women who are the more avoidant types showed any real changes.
In trying to resolve conflict in a relationship, women are more likely to want to guide a conversation. They are the ones actively working to get the situation resolved in this situation, the psychology shows. Although the women showed increased cortisol levels before and during the confrontation, the level decreased dramatically after. Getting the conflict over quickly was more physiologically satisfying, the women showed.
Conversely, conflict resolution in men showed to be more passive. There was evidence that they as well wanted the conflict resolved however they weren’t anxious to confront the conflict head on. Female partners who were more secure, the men showed lower levels of anxiety. Whether the male counterpart was secure or not, there was no change in the level of anxiety in the women.
Whether you go to family therapy or psychologists to seek out relationship advice, they are going to try to help you understand how men and women react differently. Studying the effects of conflict in men and women in the above research will help you know why they react the way that they do in the relationship. Research done by psychology and physiological teams, will help you heal your broken heart and deal with conflict better.